Okay. So here we are. Back in my first blog. And why?
Main reason is....I'm totally lost.
I got back on at K-mart because I was tired of not having any money. My parents seem sure that I'm going to immediately find a full-time job with benefits. I'm obviously (after two months of fruitless search) less convinced.
But all in all, my life just lacks clarity. For once, I'm absolutely certain where I want to go in my love life, and I'm almost as certain that God wants the same thing for me.
But here I am. 22. Heart for acting/theatre/the lot. I don't think I can live with myself if I'm not contributing to this world. And I settled for part time at K-mart while I look for a job, but I'm thankful for the flexibility which allows me to do a show, and I would do this for the rest of my life if I could. I don't mind a part-time retail job if my passion is being actively used to counteract it.
Here's the other problem: My future. I want to get married eventually and I have to have the money to support not only myself but (quite likely, anyway) someone else.
Options:
1.) Eventually find a full-time job, that I will likely hate and be less-than-qualified to do, or not at all interested in doing, but will make a good life for me and my future wife (fingers still crossed on that one).
2.) Graduate School- I'm torn about this one, because ideally I would study acting, but I could finish a Communication Studies degree faster, and I have that much better of a chance in the job market with Master's Degree. I would need to take the GRE VERY soon to have a chance of being admitted in the fall (to something other than an acting program, which don't always require it)
3.) Continue with my current course and work part-time while chasing the dream. I've been blessed with parents who aren't pressuring me (too much :P) to get out of their house. All of that stress, I have placed on myself. Obviously, (as stated above) I'm okay with this for me, but pursuing life as a family man...I just don't know.
My girlfriend is very supportive in all this. She doesn't want me to give up my dreams for her sake (and I wouldn't) but I want the world for her, not for me. One (of MANY) reasons she is so great is that she understands my plight as an artist, and I hers. I would never trade that for anything.
Here's what I ask of my readers. Prayers. Encouragement. Advice. Anything you've got. I need to better in my own prayer life, too. Hopefully this well help push me there.
Anyway, I love you. Thanks for reading if you did. Comments are appreciated. :)
Nick
